Moving is a very cleansing experience for me, generally. It’s not just about moving from one physical location to another, it’s also about purging, taking stock, reevaluating, and rethinking the things I have come to take for granted.
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I can’t ever get to sleep on Sunday nights. Even when I go to bed on time or early I just lie awake in bed staring at the ceiling, NOT sleeping.
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This makes post number 5 for today, but if I take long enough to write the whole thing down, then maybe it won’t post until tomorrow… heh.
I am a complete and utter slacker today. I really should be moving… I should have done *anything* productive today, but I haven’t. It’s been incredibly hot and, quite frankly, I just don’t feel like it. This is not a good mindset for me to be in right now, since there is a lot of work that needs to be done.
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I remember, when I was about 3 or 4 years old having what I felt was a very important conversation with my mother. “How can people say that you should never talk to strangers? If you never talk to strangers, you’ll never make ANY friends at all.” This led my mother to discuss with me what makes a person safe to talk to and how to feel out most situations and decide which strangers were ok to talk to and which ones to avoid. Finish Reading »
Gossip though I may be, I can keep secrets pretty well. My other gossipy friends understand the rules when it comes to secrets. There are a couple people in my circle who hear most everything unless it comes along with “Do not tell anyone, not even [insert person’s name]”. Non-gossips will generally add that “don’t tell anyone” and I always respect that.
I don’t even necessarily need the don’t tell to understand when a secret is really a secret… and some secrets are kept from *everyone*, regardless of whether they know the person or are safe. Some things are too private to ever be disclosed, even in “this friend of mine” vagaries. I have a lot of respect for secrets… well, the secrets of other people, anyway.
My own secrets are a totally different story.
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I apologize for how vague this is going to be. There are several important reasons that it *needs* to be vague, none of which I intend to disclose to the internet at large. “She” is not one person, but rather several people who have said various things to me that I need to decompress.
I intended to write Thursday, but never actually had any time to do so. Not that that’s a bad thing, since I was productive and then went out, but that was a much needed distraction.
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I didn’t *actually* wind up moving anything yesterday. Probably that was a smart thing, but I’m starting to feel the pressure weigh on me. I have a LOT to move and not nearly as much time as it feels like.
…and maybe he’s right.
So I’m moving to a bigger apartment. Staying in my neighborhood, keeping my landlords, but getting the bigger (and better) place. I have 10 days to move everything I’ve accumulated in the past 5 years and get all my crap out of Mom’s basement. I got the keys on Sunday and didn’t do a DAMNED thing.
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I went through three flowers today, all in my hair, one at a time. The heat still hasn’t broken, so as each flower wilted, I had to replace it with another one. I was fully prepared for the mocking I assumed would ensue, but the flower was so subtle that few noticed it and even the teasing was in good fun and sport.
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