Campfyre Stories

So…  they call me "Sunshine".

This is not a recent thing.  It occurred to me the last time someone did that, that people have been calling me "Sunshine" for most of my life.  It’s people who don’t really know me, but see me on a regular basis, like the people behind the counter at the cafes that I frequent, or folks who I know well enough that they might call me a pet name.

It’s weird.

I asked around to find out if anyone could tell me WHY they call me "Sunshine" and the reaction from most people was "Well, *I* don’t call you that."  And they don’t, but a lot of random people do.

I suppose I can come off as rather sunny and have been known, in exceptionally perky moments to say "I am a merry ray of sunshine", but only ever to someone I knew, and, let’s be honest here, more as a warning of just how perky I was feeling that particular morning than some kind of "call me Sunshine" kind of invitation.

Thinking about it, though, I realized that a lot of people count on me for optimism.  There are a few instances that I can think of where the people around me have been highly rattled by the fact that I was DOWN, whether that meant depressed or angry or completely apathetic.  Without a chipper smile or a "bright side" to relay, it makes people very nervous…  Most nervous when I don’t even make an effort to hide it.

But in general, I’m not really all that sunshiny.  I’m snarky and sarcastic and kind of bitchy and judgmental and sometimes mean.  Of course, that said, I hang around with people who tend to be even worse than I am about that sort of thing, so maybe it’s a comparison bit.

I’m not sure if I’m doing something wrong or right that people who don’t know me not only think of me that way, but turn it into my name-of-convenience.

Although I suppose there is some potential correlation between being the FyreGoddess and the sun being a giant ball of fire in the sky.  Maybe I just need to spin this whole thing a little better…